I like Johnny Depp. He’s a fun, dynamic actor. But ever since Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl put him back on the map, critics and audiences alike have kissed his butt like he is the ruler of the world. Has everyone failed to notice that he has only done two good movies since Blow in 2001?
That’s right, you heard me! Sure, some of his bad movies weren’t THAT bad, but they sure as hell weren’t that good, and some have been downright awful. Here are the good ones:
- Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black
The idea sounded dreadful from the start, but somehow Disney and Johnny Depp managed to make an entertaining, funny and dark “family” film. A surprisingly good film, especially considering it’s based on a theme park ride.
- Finding Neverland
This award-winning drama wasn’t particularly memorable, but was still entrancing while you were watching it.
And that’s it! Two good movies in the last seven years, yet Depp is still as popular as ever. That’s all fine and good, but acknowledge his failures, people!
The bad ones:
- Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)
This follow-up to one of my favorite action films of all time – Desperado – was supposed to kick ass, but instead it was one of the worst movies ever to grace the silver screen. Depp was dreadful in it, too.
- Secret Window (2004)
This movie was good for a while, until the final act killed any chance of it being any good. The final minutes are particularly bad, especially when Depp dons braces.
- The Libertine (2004)
Not as dreadful as it was boring, most people probably don’t even know Depp starred in this film – if they even heard of it in the first place.
- Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)
Another Tim Burton collaboration, this one had the makings of being awesome, except Depp’s portrayal of Willy Wonka came off more like a creepy Michael Jackson than anything else. Again, not horrible, but not very goo, either.
- Corpse Bride (2005)
Probably his best of the bad, the only thing wrong with Corpse Bride is that it is no Nightmare Before Christmas. It was mildly entertaining but never very engaging.
- Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (2006)
They should have left it as a sequel. This movie sucked balls.
- Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (2007)
Not quite as bad as #2, this one still also sucked balls.
- Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
Quite possibly the worst musical I have seen in a long while. Depp isn’t bad as the title character, and Tim Burton tries, but the story is surprisingly dull and the musical, presumably derived from the play, is terrible and often cringe-inducing.