Sci-Fi Channel’s Mammoth DVD Really Sucks
Mammoth came out on DVD on January 8, 2008, but I had to wait to watch this one with my mom. You see, I’m not a big fan of direct-to-DVD or TV movies, especially ones like Mammoth which are pretty much guaranteed to be lousy. My mom, on the other hand, loves these kinds of pictures.
Having just sat through the travesty that was the Seahawks-Packers game (my mom, being first a Packers fan, second a Seahawks fan, was quite happy, while I, being by far and away a Seahawks fan for life, spent my afternoon cursing out the Seattle defense on their horrific performance at Lambeau Field), the last thing I needed was to put a nail in the coffin with a terrible movie from the Sci-Fi Channel (aside from Battlestar Galactica, has this channel ever produced anything even remotely good?) – but that was the plan.
Mammoth is about a killer mammoth who comes back to life in a small, modern day town. How does it come alive, you wonder? Why, aliens crash land in the museum where the mammoth was being held and take over the body, then proceed to run around town stepping on people and sucking the life energy out of others. The scientist who was studying the mammoth is forced to team with a “Men in Black” federal agent to take down the seemingly unstoppable creature.
It’s really quite an absurd movie. I was expecting a standard movie about a killer mammoth (created through cloning or what not), but instead get an absolutely cheesy and shockingly dull flick about a computer-generated mammoth-monster inhabited by aliens. Admittedly, it’s quite clear the creators of the movie did not intend for Mammoth to be taken too seriously, but whatever they did intend, I hope it wasn’t the final product.
Mammoth just isn’t fun to watch. Crappy monster movies can still be entertaining if there are enough deaths or cheap thrills, but Mammoth lacks almost all of that. Nothing – literally nothing – happens for the first half hour of this 90 minute picture, and the mammoth probably only has five to ten minutes of screen time total. Of course, given that the creature looks less like a mammoth (aren’t they supposed to be woolly?) and more like some amalgam of other monsters, it’s no wonder the director decided to leave the monster off screen most of the time. Still, Mammoth is so boring at times I almost fell asleep.
Mammoth is sadly a step up from some other Sci-Fi Channel productions, but it is still another lousy sci-fi movie with lame special effects, a terrible script and uninspired delivery. Why I decided to watch this piece of crap is anyone’s guess, but definitely avoid Mammoth at all costs.