How the F**k Did Sweeney Todd Win Best Picture?

Sweeney Todd Movie PosterUp until now, I’ve stayed quiet on the Golden Globes. Yes, the reason is partially that I’ve been too busy to do a blog post, but after the winners were announced in a press conference earlier in the week, I had to chime in. How in God’s name did Sweeney Todd win Best Musical or Comedy at the Golden Globes?

Sweeney Todd, directed by Tim Burton and starring Johnny Depp, is a f**k up in more ways than one. The production values are pretty good, but the movie is boring and features some of the worst music to ever grace musicals. The songs are literally brain numbing, and when sung by the likes of Helena Bonham Carter (who was somehow nominated for Best Actress for her role) and several other actors who just weren’t made for musicals, the film just sucked. Two of my buddies spent most of the time laughing at how bad it was, and even my brother, who I thought might like the film, didn’t find much to be entertained by. My movie review is less than friendly.

All four of the other movies nominated in the category are so much better. Hairspray isn’t anything spectacular, but Charlie Wilson’s War and Across the Universe are both a step above much of the landscape. Juno is simply terrific, and a legitimate (albeit unlikely) contender for Oscar Gold.

I’ve never been a huge fan of the Golden Globes. I never understood the point of them. They’re like the Oscars, only not as prestigious and not as meaningful, and they often have a few off-the-wall surprises like Sweeney Todd that just plain out suck. It’s hard to take the Golden Globes too seriously, and they’re pretty much like Spring Training to the MLB or Pre-Season for the NFL. In other words, they’re meaningless.

While I’m on my rant about the Golden Globes, I’ve always hated the Best Musical or Comedy category. I do realize that comedies often get screwed when it comes to year-end awards (though since Shakespeare in Love, not nearly so much), but the Best Musical or Comedy category often serves as a means to provide non-deserving films a chance at an award (come on, did anyone really think that Dreamgirls was that good of a movie?). Thinking of Dreamgirls, the category tends to favor dramas that happen to have music in them. As Chicago proved, musicals can compete with dramas in the main event, so why should musical dramas (Walk the Line, Ray, Dreamgirls and so on and so forth) get placed in a separate category, which only serves to neglect the real point of the category: to benefit comedies.

And furthermore, do you realize that the Golden Globes nominated 12 movies for best picture this year? 12 movies! For some reason, they nominated seven movies for Best Drama, and another five for Best Musical or Comedy. That means that twelve different movies get to market that they were nominated for Best Picture at the Golden Globes. What bullsh*t.

At least Atonement and Daniel Day-Lewis won for Best Drama and Best Actor respectively.

By Erik Samdahl
Related categories: Movies
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