Movie Reviews

When Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse debuted in February, I was mildly intrigued to see what the man had come up with. I never watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer but was a huge fan of Firefly and its companion film Serenity, and so Whedon’s name alone was enough to get me to watch the premiere. The show didn’t look all that great from the previews, as the Fox marketing team had once again failed to present it as quality material (when Firefly first came out, I also thought it looked incredibly stupid). The show also stars Eliza Dushku, a sexy woman who I like to look at but have always equated with B-grade television.

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Mischa Barton left The O.C. at the end of season three, perhaps a wise move considering the once-popular television series was fading quickly at that point. But even though she got out just in time, Barton has yet to make a name for herself as anyone but Marissa Cooper. Her latest film, the limited release thriller Homecoming, won’t change that, though the movie itself is surprisingly easy to watch.

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The time is near, that when the Harry Potter franchise delivers its final whisk of the wand. The tension is starting to build, and Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, the sixth entry in the blockbuster franchise, is a key indicator of how the story of Harry, Ron and Hermione will end. David Yates, who also directed the previous Harry Potter film, is back at the helm – as he will be for the final two movies – but there was no certainty that the franchise would end on a high note. After sitting through two and a half hours of the latest Harry Potter, however, I can say with confidence that I can’t wait for the final chapters to arrive.

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Forget Megan Fox. Odette Yustman is the hottest young actress working today. In her follow-up to Cloverfield, in which she made a name for herself despite being in the movie for just a few minutes, she plays a young woman who is being haunted by her dead, unborn twin. That’s got to suck.

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There’s bad, and then there’s Street Fighter bad. And what’s worse than a Street Fighter movie but an unnecessary, unwanted sequel fifteen years after the franchise’s heyday, starring a TV actress and lacking a plot? Yes, it’s Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li.

One has to think that 20th Century Fox had this absurd idea when greenlighting the film that it would do well enough to fund several sequels titled Street Fighter: The Legend of Another Forgettable Character. Ah, Hollywood executives. You’re so cute sometimes.

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One would think that after The Marine Hollywood would have decided that John Cena wasn’t cut out for movies, but the professional wrestler is back, this time to save his wife from the hands of an evil mastermind, in 12 Rounds.

If that sounds like the plot of The Marine only more absurd, you’re not alone. In 12 Rounds though, you see, Cena is a police detective who is accidentally responsible for the death of the bad guy’s hot girlfriend. Fearing he may never get someone as hot as her again, the bad guy (Aidan Gillen) breaks out of prison a year later (I don’t believe the movie ever explains how to a satisfying degree), kidnaps Cena’s wife (Ashley Scott), blows up their house and then forces Cena to do 12 rounds of nearly impossible and even more implausible tasks to get her back. It’s like Die Hard with a Vengeance, only without Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson and entertainment value.

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When I saw the previews for Dark Streets, I was intrigued. It looked like a darker Moulin Rouge meets Chicago, a smoky musical thriller set in the underworld of New Orleans. Unfortunately, reality is often much less exciting.

Dark Streets stars Gabriel Mann as Chaz, a playboy and nightclub owner who finds his life spinning out of control amidst too many love affairs, debt and the mystery surrounding his father’s death. Though there is a plot, Dark Streets is essentially one-long music video, featuring original songs with performances by Natalie Cole, Etta James, Richie Sambora and more.

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John Travolta knows how to play memorable villains. He was intense in Face/Off, entertaining in Broken Arrow and mind blowing in Battlefield Earth. Just joking about that last one, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be excited to see the crafty Scientologist back on the dark side – and squaring off against his most worth opponent yet: Denzel Washington. Can you think of two better scene-chewing actors that should work together? Throw in the frenetic Tony Scott and you’ve got The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3, an entertaining though unexceptional action-thriller.

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Oh, how far has Harrison Ford fallen? Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was supposed to resurrect his career, but instead it just seemed to reaffirm people’s suspicions that he is a bit of a has-been, a man whose best movies are behind him. Personally, I believe he still has a few good years left in him, but Crossing Over does little to back up my position.

In Crossing Over, Ford is but one of an ensemble cast that includes the likes of Ray Liotta, Ashley Judd, Jim Sturgess (Across the Universe) and Summer Bishil (Towelhead), among others. I like the idea of Ford playing a smaller role, as going the supporting route allows actors to reestablish credibility and play characters he or she might otherwise not get to play. However, if you’re going to do an ensemble part, at least play a character that is at least marginally interesting.

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Confessions of a Shopaholic comes to DVD next Tuesday, June 23, 2009. The movie is a hate it or dislike it kind of movie, not particularly terrible as it is, ultimately, unoriginal and cliche. Those that did like the film will find little to enjoy on the DVD, as the picture contains an embarassingly small amount of special features – a couple of deleted scenes, bloopers and a music vivdeo. The second disc merely contains a digital copy, but I can’t imagine too many people are tripping over themselves to put this on their iPod.

As for the movie itself, read on to see not one, but two movie reviews for the romantic comedy.

When I think about guys who have comeback potential, I think Harrison Ford or Kevin Costner. I’d never even considered that Jean-Claude Van Damme was capable of such a designation, but here is JCVD, a self-satirical crime drama-thriller that defies genre and is actually pretty good. Yes, a pretty good Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. When was the last time you could say that?

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A movie that received little fanfare when it was released earlier this year, Fired Up looked like a cliché teen comedy in almost every way. A rip-off of Bring It On most people assumed. And yet, Fired Up is a surprisingly funny comedy that is a lot like Bring It On, except that it is told from the perspective of two horny guys who show up at cheerleader camp to get girls.

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Sam Raimi returns to the genre that put him on the map thirty years ago: the horror genre. Though now best known as the director of the Spider-Man trilogy, he has a special place in horror aficionado’s hearts for the dark-but-funny Evil Dead trilogy. And now, we get Drag Me to Hell, a hilarious throwback to the horror films of yesteryear.

Drag Me to Hell stars Alison Lohman as Christine Brown, a loan manager at a California bank, who, trying to cement a promotion to assistant manager, decides to make the tough call and deny an old gypsy woman another extension on her mortgage payment. In a fit of rage, the woman curses Christine, effectively damning her to Hell. Over the next three days, Christine begins to see and hear things and realizes she needs to do something in a hurry to avoid an unimaginable fate.

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The Hangover repeated its dominance at the box office this weekend, taking in another $33.4 million; the R-rated comedy is now on pace to rake in approximately $175 million, against a budget of $25-$35 million. The people behind Land of the Lost (biggest flop of the year?) and Terminator Salvation are shaking their heads in shame.

Up earned another $30 million, while The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 debuted in third with an okay $25 million. Eddie Murphy’s Imagine That fell flat with only $5.7 million.

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Alan Rickman, Bryan Greenberg, Shawn Hatosy, Mary Steenburgen, Bill Pulman, Eliza Dushku and Danny DeVito star in the edgy crime thriller Nobel Son, a surprisingly effective and twisting movie.

In Nobel Son, Rickman plays an obnoxiously cocky professor who has just been selected to receive the Nobel Prize. On the eve of the award ceremony, however, his son (Greenberg) is kidnapped and held for ransom by a young man with a grudge (Hatosy). But even after the ransom is paid and the son released, the con continues to play out.

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