Movie Trailers

First off, WTF. Have you seen the teaser trailer for Beverly Hills Chihuahua? This movie looks so bad it’s not even funny. This is the kind of movie parents dread with a passion; it is a guaranteed hour and a half of mind-numbing, death-inducing terror. I would want my kids subjected to something more worthwhile.

Regardless, the teaser trailer talks about the chihuahua’s heritage as coming from the Aztecs. However, when they say “Aztecs,” the teaser trailer pans over a shot of Machu Picchu in Peru. Having just been there, I’m pretty sure that the Incas built and lived in Machu Picchu, not the Aztecs. It’s a completely different civilization.

Aren’t there enough Aztec ruins to desecrate without ruining a second civilization?

While I was disappointed that the new Batman movie trailer didn’t premiere with Iron Man, I was delighted to see a new, longer and much better movie trailer for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull before the comic book film.

Some people complained that the last preview was a little too goofy and comical; apparently, someone was listening, because this new trailer has almost no humor whatsoever. That’s a good thing. The trailer starts off with a little more explanation about the myth of the Crystal Skull – essentially more information about the plot than anyone has heard about before (the Crystal Skull is believed to be some relic that, when returned to a sacred temple, the person who is responsible for its return will be able to control its power any way he or she sees fit). Beyond that, the movie trailer digresses into an action montage, some of which we’ve seen before as well as a few new tidbits.

Overall, the new Indiana Jones movie trailer is much more cohesive and really gets you pumped up, whereas the teaser trailer was entertaining but not particularly motivating. With only a few weeks left before its release, this trailer made me just a tiny bit more excited.

The new movie trailer for The Incredible Hulk, starring Ed Norton and Liv Tyler, was released today, and, much like the last trailer, it doesn’t win me over. The first trailer’s action sequences and visual effects were questionable, to say the least, and I was really hoping that a new trailer would prove me wrong. But, no! The Incredible Hulk movie trailer just reaffirms my suspicions: it’s going to have to have one hell of a screenplay to be good.

The action just looks cheesy, the visuals questionable. The Hulk seems to be captured in slow motion half the time, and that’s not a good thing.

Only time will tell, but with a lot of really cool comic book movies coming to theaters this summer, The Incredible Hulk could easily wind up in the gutter. Here’s the movie trailer:

Check out the funny new movie trailer for the movie Hancock, starring Will Smith. Smith plays a bitter superhero who causes about as much damage as he does help people. Hancock really does look like another winner for Smith, as it looks like it should offer the perfect blend of comedy and action. Surprisingly, this film has been flying under the radar, but the buzz is bound to catch up at some point.

Here’s the new Hancock movie trailer:

The new movie trailer for the upcoming sequel The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian is online in all its glory. The trailer is pretty good, having great setup with its slowly intensifying drum roll and more ominous visuals. Overall, the movie looks darker than its predecessor – and in fact one of the characters even makes note of that – which is a good thing.

Unfortunately, I got pumped up about the last Chronicles of Narnia and it ended up being underwhelming. Ultimately, the movies are still more geared towards children, which means these previews that show savage battles and intense fighting will not be nearly what they appear to be. What also concerns me is the lack of attention the trailer gives to the acting, most notably that of Ben Barnes, who plays the title character. He only gets one credited line in the trailer, and it’s a rather painfully delivered, “I am Prince Caspian.” I hope the line is just taken out of context, but I am not impressed.

Anyway, here’s the Prince Caspian movie trailer:

I just watched the teaser trailer for the upcoming Frank Miller film The Spirit, which was released yesterday. The Spirit has the same visual style as Sin City, which means that all of the fans who have been waiting for a Sin City sequel will at least be somewhat satisfied with something from the same vein.

I have no clue what The Spirit is about, but the visuals look pretty neat. The question will be: can Frank Miller, on his own, do what was clearly done by Robert Rodriguez before? The teaser trailer isn’t amazing and certainly doesn’t captivate the way that long Sin City ComiCon teaser did for us a few years earlier. The visuals are there, but not much happens to make us really excited for the film. I’m sure the next teaser will be a little more action packed, but here, all we get to see is some dude jumping around. There’s no real sense of seediness or suspense, and that’s a problem.

Still, for something to whet people’s appetites, it’s good enough.

Here’s The Spirit teaser trailer:

Have you ever fantasized about the babysitter? Maybe just a little? I’m not a father and I don’t have kids, but I have to imagine one or two over the course of time has been tempted by a young beauty. A couple have probably given into their temptations, too. However, I can’t imagine too many have found themselves caught up in an illegal prostitution ring started by a high school girl looking to pay for college, and who will do anything to cover her tracks.

That’s the plot of The Babysitters, the upcoming film that opens in early May. I wouldn’t say the girls in the movie are steaming hot, but they’re good enough… who knows, maybe even more realistic.

I’ve added the new (very hot) movie poster, an image gallery and… the Babysitters movie trailer:

The new movie trailer for the upcoming Kate Hudson movie My Best Friend’s Girl arrived today, and it looks awfully a lot like… How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. The only difference is that in this movie, Dane Cook is trying to lose Hudson as fast as possible, and Dane Cook is no Matthew McConaughey.

In reality, I like the concept for the movie. In what could also be described as a reversal of Good Luck Chuck, Cook plays a guy who gets paid to act like an ass some ex-girlfriends will run back to the boyfriends they just dumped. Jason Biggs plays Cook’s best friend who, after being dumped by Hudson, hires Cook to work his “charm” on her. Naturally, the two fall in love, putting Cook in a very precarious position.

The movie trailer isn’t particularly funny (it ones again features Dane Cook tripping in front of a girl!), but it looks harmless enough. Here’s the My Best Friend’s Girl movie trailer:

I just watched the so-called movie trailer for the upcoming George Lucas movie Star Wars: The Clone Wars, which is an animated film that takes place between the second and third movies. The movie trailer, which can be seen below, looks more like an unofficial teaser trailer, as it really is just a montage of scenes and special effects without any kind of storytelling narrative, setup or exposition. The trailer also ends on a cheesy note, which makes me think that this video is not intended to be any kind of official preview (plus it lacks credits and MPAA approval).

Anyway, I have no clue what to make of this new Star Wars movie. It’s going to be challenging watching a feature-length Star Wars movie as a cartoon, no matter how good the visuals are. The action will probably be pretty engaging as Lucas has always been good at drawing his audiences into battle sequences, but the movie is really going to struggle when the characters are on the screen and talking. The actual human characters are cartoons originally intended for the small screen – they certainly aren’t up to Pixar standards, and that’s a problem. Will I be able to get past the poor facial features and focus on the story? I don’t know.

Ultimately, I am 50/50 on the movie. Part of me is excited that another Star Wars movie is coming out, but part of me wishes that the movie just remain a TV pilot. If the prequel movies didn’t ruin the Star Wars experience for you, a theatrical cartoon version might. While I have to assume that this movie will make a decent amount of money, I have to wonder how many people will actually go see it. The casual viewer is not going to be so thrilled to go watch a cheesy Star Wars cartoon; it’s going to be for die hards only.

Only time will tell… Until then, here’s the Star Wars “movie trailer:”

I finally gave in and watched some promotional material for Zombie Strippers, a movie about… zombie strippers. I have seen some movie posters floating around recently, but disregarded the film as B-grade crap. Having now watched the new red band trailer, which is included farther down this article, it definitely looks like B-grade crap, though if Sony markets the film right and takes a Snakes on a Plane angle, they might be able to squeak a few dollars out of the concept.

But that’s not what this post is about.

The Red Band trailer for Zombie Strippers is just plain awful. I’m not talking about the content, the forced dialogue, the cheesy script or the B-grade look. No, I’m talking about the lack of material, or the lack of the lack of material in the trailer. Just so you know, Red Band trailers are previews that are only allowed to be viewed by restricted audiences – i.e. people who can legally get into R-rated movies. Hence, as seen in the Pathology Red Band trailer, gore, nudity and the like are technically allowed.

The Zombie Strippers Red Band trailer looks like a toned-down version of a Green Band (approved for general audiences) trailer. There’s no nudity, no gore and absolutely nothing that would entice me to go see this flick. If I’m going to pay money to waste an hour and a half of my time watching a crappy movie, I better get some brilliant gore and a lot of breasts, and it’s the Red Band trailer’s job to notify me if such a movie is worth the investment.

So far, it appears as though Zombie Strippers is going to be a PG-rated waste of time.

Here’s the Zombie Strippers Red Band trailer:

I just watched the new movie trailer for House Bunny, the latest comedy starring Anna Farris. I have actually grown to find her quite hot… unfortunately, she continues to choose absolutely idiotic movies. I have absolutely zero interest in House Bunny, which looks about as original… hell, I don’t have to work anymore this week – thus my mind has shutdown and I can’t think of anything clever to say.

Anyway, House Bunny is about a Playboy Bunny, who, after getting kicked out of the mansion for being too old (at age 27), moves into a sorority with a bunch of loser girls. As one might imagine, she teaches the intellectuals how to look pretty and get guys, while she falls for a guy who is more interested in smart women. Sound like any other college movie? I thought so.

The movie trailer really isn’t funny at all, but you can see for yourself:

Here’s a Uwe Boll video you have to see, talking about people’s attempts to get 1,000,000 people to sign a petition calling for Uwe Boll to stop making movies:

The teaser trailer for the new Ice Age movie, Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs, is now online, and once again it features Scrat trying to get his acorn. The Ice Age movies have always been pretty dreadful, but the marketing campaigns – hence the previews – have always been very clever and funny. The teaser trailers are particularly entertaining, but this one… this one is not. The teaser trailer for Ice Age 3 just isn’t as funny, clever, original or entertaining as marketing material for the past two films, and that doesn’t bode well.

Honestly, I’m sick of these movies. Ice Age 2 wasn’t a complete disaster, but of all the animated films to be turned into a franchise, I’ve always felt the Ice Age films to be some of the weakest of the bunch. They just aren’t that funny or entertaining.

Here’s the teaser trailer for your own perusal:

The new movie trailer (or is it a teaser trailer?) for Space Chimps (view Space Chimps movie details here) is now online in all its glory, but before I get to that, let me touch on the Space Chimps official site. What a frikkin’ disaster.

I don’t like wasting time, especially when it’s for watching a movie preview that should take up at most two-and-a-half minutes of my life. I also don’t like jerky loading times, video that pauses mid-stride and so on and so forth. So, I headed over to the official movie website to check out the new Space Chimps trailer, and this is my encounter:

1. I hit a very slow-loading Flash intro screen that takes abnormally long.
2. This leads to an intro screen with some guy in a lab dance doing a weird dance and talking (singing?). Unfortunately, the video is so choppy I can’t understand what he’s saying. I should have hit “Skip.”
3. I am then funneled into the actual official site, where the movie trailer begins to load. Good, I think.
4. Except that after another long Flash loading screen, things are still problematic. I can see in the play bar that trailer is loading at a decent clip, but not only does it not start playing automatically, when I click on the play button, nothing happens.
5. Frustrated after about a minute of this, I open up Internet Explorer to see if I can get better luck in there. Just as I do that, the trailer starts playing in Firefox.
6. The trailer comes to an abrupt halt about four times during its short running time, even though it had fully loaded a couple minutes earlier.
7. I’m waiting so long that I switch screens to start working on something else. The trailer starts playing and, with the audio at its normal level, I nearly have a heart attack each time it resumes from a pause.

I don’t know who to blame here. Maybe I’m on a bad connection, but I doubt it. Maybe the server administrators are to blame for underestimating the amount of bandwidth needed to host the website. Maybe the Flash designer coded something poorly so everything takes a really long time to load. I don’t know, but this isn’t a great first impression for a movie in the year 2008.

As for Space Chimps the movie, it looks decent enough. The trailer, which I’m pretty sure is actually a teaser trailer, has its moments as we get to see some animated chimpanzees prepare for lift off. It appears as though they end up traveling through a wormhole, though that’s as far as we get to see initially. As a teaser, this works, though you can certainly tell this is not going to be an animated classic by any stretch of the animation. The visuals are pretty decent, but appear to be made more to make a quick buck than win any awards. The humor should appeal well enough to young children.

The first Watchmen video journal is online, which takes a look at the production design. There’s no footage from the Watchmen movie, but it does go into some detail on the scope of the sets and the detail the crew is giving the film to stay true to the comic book.

Thanks to Crave for posting this…