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The FilmJabber Movie Blog

Scarlett Johansson Becomes Hermione Granger

Yes, Scarlett Johansson is replacing Emma Watson in the final Harry Potter movie. Warner Brothers said, “We felt, as Hermione Granger reaches a proper age, that she needed to have more curves and sex appeal. Scarlett brings that to the table.” Reports are also coming in that the ending of the series will be modified: […]

Indie Film Feature: Nemesis (2008)

Every once in a while, I receive a request to review or feature an independently produced film that has been made. I don’t have a time to review a bunch of movies that will probably never be seen by the vast majority of my readers, but after receiving several requests in the last week, I […]

Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead DVD Review

Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead was released on DVD on April 15th, so I’m a few days behind on my DVD review. The movie, as you probably don’t know, is about two brothers (Philip Seymour Hoffman and Ethan Hawke) who, after some rough times, decide to commit an armed robbery. Their target of choice? […]

Hot New Movie: The Babysitters Movie Trailer

Have you ever fantasized about the babysitter? Maybe just a little? I’m not a father and I don’t have kids, but I have to imagine one or two over the course of time has been tempted by a young beauty. A couple have probably given into their temptations, too. However, I can’t imagine too many […]

My Best Friend’s Girl Movie Trailer

The new movie trailer for the upcoming Kate Hudson movie My Best Friend’s Girl arrived today, and it looks awfully a lot like… How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. The only difference is that in this movie, Dane Cook is trying to lose Hudson as fast as possible, and Dane Cook is no […]

The New X-Files 2 Movie Title… Sucks!

I’m starting to feel and sound like a bitter old man. Nothing seems to please me of late, other than driving around Green Lake in Seattle and admiring all of the beautiful female joggers that were out in storm today. So, maybe it’s just me, but does the new title for the new X-Files movie […]

What to Make of Star Wars: The Clone Wars?

I just watched the so-called movie trailer for the upcoming George Lucas movie Star Wars: The Clone Wars, which is an animated film that takes place between the second and third movies. The movie trailer, which can be seen below, looks more like an unofficial teaser trailer, as it really is just a montage of […]

Will Speed Racer Flop Already?

I’m sorry, but does Speed Racer look like one of the worst movies ever conceived to you? Every time I see a trailer or a commercial or an email or an article about the movie, I cringe. Those poor saps who work at the movie theaters where the commercials are playing on the overhead TVs […]

Zombie Strippers Red Band Trailer: Where’s the Nudity?

I finally gave in and watched some promotional material for Zombie Strippers, a movie about… zombie strippers. I have seen some movie posters floating around recently, but disregarded the film as B-grade crap. Having now watched the new red band trailer, which is included farther down this article, it definitely looks like B-grade crap, though […]

How Will the Descent 2 Movie Work?

OK, so in the American version of The Descent, Sarah, the lead character, scrambles up a bone-filled hill, crawls through a hole and escapes the cave where the monsters who killed all her friends dwell. She runs through the forest like a crazy woman, gets in her car and drives away. Once she is far […]

House Bunny Raises the Roof… Of Unoriginality

I just watched the new movie trailer for House Bunny, the latest comedy starring Anna Farris. I have actually grown to find her quite hot… unfortunately, she continues to choose absolutely idiotic movies. I have absolutely zero interest in House Bunny, which looks about as original… hell, I don’t have to work anymore this week […]

Lars and the Real Girl DVD Sucks

I just received the Lars and the Real Girl DVD today in the mail. I got home from work at 5:30, went to my chiropractor’s from 6 to 7, watched the Seattle Mariners finally win a game (what is going on with their bullpen/offense?) and then squeezed in a trip to Costco. Got back at […]

5 Reasons the Cars 2 Movie Will Suck

Along with the announcement that Disney was going to release all of their new CGI-animated cartoons in 3D format came the horrifying revelation that for some God-awful reason, Disney and Pixar were going to make Cars 2. It’s sad to think that Pixar is going to devote its time to making a sequel of its […]

Uwe Boll Talks to His Anti-Fans Video

Here’s a Uwe Boll video you have to see, talking about people’s attempts to get 1,000,000 people to sign a petition calling for Uwe Boll to stop making movies:

Cloverfield DVD Review and Bonus Features Review

Some people hated Cloverfield. I honestly don’t get it. The movie is fast-paced, action-packed, has great special effects and is rarely, if ever, cheesy. How many monster movies, especially movies about big monsters that attack cities, can make that claim? Cloverfield is probably the closest thing you’ll get to a “realistic” monster movie. As for […]
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