One of the worst movies to grace the silver screen in a long time, "Date Movie" stars Alyson Hannigan in a Scary Movie-esque spoof of romantic comedies - the problem is, the screenwriters forgot that they were supposed to be making fun of said genre. Instead, most jokes revolve around some kind of idiotic, nauseating toilet humor that even had me searching for the remote to fast-forward.
Honestly, how hard is it to spoof romantic comedies? Romantic comedies are by far one of the most clichéd, generic and predictable genres known to man, and seemingly hundreds of them come out every year for "Date Movie" to drill into. Instead of looking at what makes romantic comedies so silly at times (the instant makeover of an already-beautiful actress, the required second act break-up, the rival competition, the chase-to-get-her-back scene at the end), "Date Movie" simply plucks scenes out of other movies, alters them slightly, throws in some toilet humor and hopes that audiences won't notice that they just paid good money for a piece of shit movie. I don't swear often in my reviews, and normally would say "piece of crap," but this is definitely a piece of shit.
In fact, this movie is so bad that it makes me want to write my own satire or spoof of the genre just so I can drive up alongside writer/director Aaron Seltzer and beat him over the head with the script to show him just how easy making fun of romantic comedies is.
Amazingly, even though the movie is only PG-13 and I rarely find toilet humor overtly disgusting, "Date Movie" is revolting. There's a scene where they spend minutes focused on the "Meet the Parents" cat ripping farts in the bathroom, and another that plays on Ben Stiller rubbing his face against a fat guy's greasy, hairy chest, only this time all that hair ends up in the dude's mouth. The movie takes great care in taking its time as he spits the hair out in one, slimy hairball. Isn't stuff like this more damaging to a kid's mind than sex and violence in movies?
"Date Movie" is one of the dumbest and most mind-numbing films in years. It is gross and so unfunny you'd swear it is intentional - maybe the real joke is that the studio executives are laughing at every person who has ever paid money to see this crap.
Review by Erik Samdahl unless otherwise indicated.
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