The Santa Clause 2 Movie Review
It came out over a year ago, but did anyone really notice? In fact, I think the studio hoped that people would just forget about The Santa Clause 2, a movie that made them a lot much money for some reason or another.
Tim Allen, the defunct "Home Improvement" star who has done a series of flops since his show ended (most of them deserving such treatment), plays the jolly old elf in the sequel to the 1994 hit. In the first movie, he knocked Santa Clause off of his roof and in the process became the very man, unable to lose weight or shave. In this movie, the exact opposite is happening as Christmas nears and he has yet to find a wife, which apparently is a requirement of the job (of course, shouldn't the elves, who have been around for 900 years, know this?). So, starting to look like a normal man again, he returns to the real world to take care of his son and find a mate.
God, it is hard to know where to begin. The Santa Clause 2 is bad on so many levels. The movie is aimed at such small children that it is impossible to appeal to any of Allen's fan base; only a couple jokes hit the mark, and even they are quite forced. Director Michael Lembeck's vision of the North Pole is so goofy and cheap that I cannot even imagine little children liking it...
You want specifics, huh? To begin with, the first half hour of the film takes place entirely in the North Pole, as Santa (a.k.a. Scott Calvin) learns that his son is on the Naughty list and that he needs to find a wife within 28 days. So, amidst goofy reindeer and elves that don't even look like elves (the budget was so cheap that elves look like a bunch of children with pointed ears), he makes a copy of himself that ends up looking like a toy, and this toy becomes an authoritarian Santa that creates an army of toy soldiers that locks up all of the elves. Yes, I know - this is a children's story...
Anyway, after almost getting to the point where the movie needed to be turned off to avoid damaging the television, it does get a little better once Santa makes it to the real world and starts dating (including a fairly funny scene with Molly Shannon). However, it hovers at barely tolerable for about half an hour before becoming completely absurd again.
Of course, by the end of the movie, the stupid plastic Santa has been defeated, Tim Allen is still Santa and he has found a wife (which is the most unbelievable aspect of the movie, sadly enough). Nothing really makes sense, but that's okay because my eyes had glazed over by the time the credits rolled.
The Santa Clause 2 is one of the more dreadful movies to come out in recent years, and is by far one of the most pathetic blockbuster films ever. It is sad when this one is Tim Allen's only hit; it isn't even good for a kid's flick. This Christmas, I will ask the real Santa to destroy all copies of this movie.
Review by Erik Samdahl unless otherwise indicated.