The dinosaurs are back, but you're willingness to return to the park will depend on your tolerance for stupidity.

Jurassic World's successes and failures rely on what you want from it: do you want mindless, popcorn fun, or do you want something that harkens back to the mastery of the original? The movie skews heavily toward the former, a spectacle film that basically says fuck you to reason and logic in favor of dinosaur mayhem. It's fun, entertaining, but boy...

It is fucking dumb.

I rarely swear in movie reviews, but when I do, it's for good reason. As a huge fan of the original (who isn't?), and even someone who appreciates The Lost World for what it is, I so desperately wanted to love this movie. I didn't want to be that guy, that critic, who declares that Jurassic World is fun and entertaining, but so dumb that its dumbness ruins the affair.

But here I am, in that exact position.

Jurassic World is not an awful movie. Far from it. If all you want is mindless dinosaur fun, then the movie is for you—and you will not be alone. Jurassic World will be huge, and for good reason. But I expected more. Hell, I just expected something that wouldn't make Michael Crichton roll over in his grave. He's definitely a'rolling right about now.

So, what works?

1. The movie definitely has popcorn factor. If you like your sequels bigger and dumber, Jurassic World doesn't disappoint. The movie is funnier than any of its predecessors, and there is plenty of dino action to go around. Dinosaur-on-dinosaur fighting will have Godzilla/King Kong fans cheering.
2. The overall concept. Honestly, the premise is awesome. After three movies where bad things have happened to a relatively few people, it only made sense to show what would happen when disaster strikes when 20,000 people are on the island.
3. The visual effects. I won't say the visual effects are amazing. The dinosaurs look a whole lot less real than they did back in 1993 when Steven Spielberg, who produced but didn't direct this one, used animatronics. But they still work for the story at hand, and Jurassic World dazzles with plenty of color and spectacle.
4. Chris Pratt. Despite being handed the most one-liners since 1980's action movies, Pratt manages to serve as an effective protagonist and all-around charming badass, proving that not only was his charisma in Guardians of the Galaxy not a fluke, but he is a legitimate leading man.

Unfortunately, here's what doesn't:

1. The screenplay and acting. As time progresses, you realize just how awful the screenplay is. The dialogue gets increasingly worse throughout the movie, logic is fed as bait in the first act, and the characters range from bland to nonsensical. Bryce Dallas Howard appears frustrated playing the stereotypical uptight-and-neurotic-with-no-kids business woman, the two boys (Ty Simpkins and Nick Robinson) seem disinterested throughout, and Vincent D'Onofrio... what the fuck.
2. Vincent D'Onofrio, military weaponry and... huh? The movie invokes a side story that seems largely unnecessary, or is at least woefully underdeveloped, for the story at hand. Dinosaurs escaping at a theme park should have been enough. Vincent D'Onofrio is terrible, but worse, his character makes no sense, making decisions and having motivations that even a person locked in an insane asylum would never make.
3. The velociraptors. Hey, we have one super dangerous dinosaur on the loose, so why not release several other, slightly-trained-but-not-really carnivorous killers to track it down? What could possible go wrong? The third act of Jurassic World is mind-numbingly dumb, and the velociraptors play a large role.
4. The score. Normally I don't fixate on a movie's music (at least not negatively), but given that the Jurassic Park movies have great soundtracks, it's shocking how unimpressive most of the score was for this movie. The music sounded routine at best, and Jurassic World deserved better.

Jurassic World is a fun ride, as long as you check your brain at the door, feed it to dinosaurs, and consume their feces just to make sure nothing is left. But it's disappointing to see that the franchise has completely abandoned intelligence to just be another mindless summer blockbuster. Because, let's face it: this movie is fucking dumb.

Review by Erik Samdahl.