Legion Movie Review
If God were truly pissed off at humanity, what would he do? Subject the world to a gigantic flood, wiping all but a lucky few from the face of the planet? Nope. That would be way too easy. No, He would unleash a horde of demons, zombies and angels upon the remnants of humanity. Thankfully for the humans, God's creatures can, for some reason or another, be killed by bullets. Welcome to Legion, the latest action movie to hit Blu-Ray and DVD.
Legion stars Dennis Quad, Tyrese Gibson and Lucas Black as part of a group of survivors who are at the center of an ongoing apocalypse. With the sun blotted out for eternity, the small group - with the help of a rebellious angel played by Paul Bettany - fends off the legions of Heaven (which, generally, look more like the legions of Hell) while cooped up in a remote diner. Their goal: protect a pregnant mother, whose child is humanity's only chance for salvation.
To be frank, Legion looked terrible. The scene with the grandma telling the pregnant girl that her baby was going to burn, biting off a chunk of a man's neck and then crawling across the ceiling is absurdly cheesy, despite director Scott Stewart's intention that it be anything but. That was a scene that was chosen to be featured in the trailers, and I was done after that. But I have a nasty habit of watching stupid-looking movies on DVD/Blu-Ray (mainly because they magically show up on my doorstep), so Legion got another chance...
And it's actually pretty entertaining. Stupid, but entertaining. Ignoring the fact that the God in this movie could wipe out all the protagonists in a second if He wanted to, Stewart does a good job of keeping things simple and to the point, never trying to do too much or overreach the limitations of the screenplay. The movie remains interesting enough throughout, even though it does slow down too much in the second act. The action, though hardly memorable, is entertaining, and the cast holds their own.
Despite its simplicity, it's hard to get past a few items, like why God's minions are so Hellish or why the baby is so important, other than being a baby. Legion also takes itself a bit too seriously, though I'd prefer that than it delving into an abundance of cheesy one-liners.
Legion isn't anything special, but it's a surprisingly effective action thriller that accomplishes its goal: to be mindless, early year entertainment.
Review by Erik Samdahl unless otherwise indicated.